Read Receipt and Other Annoying Email Habits

You just started your new job and now you’re tasked with sending and replying to countless emails all day. This is your chance to be creative. People need to know you are unique and have a style all your own. Besides, you don’t want to be THAT person. You know, the one who abides by all the email etiquette rules. Let’s get started.

1. Change Your Fonts and Colors

You are much more than the mundane black and white or Times New Roman. While everyone else sends the so-called professional emails, you’ll send the exciting, attention grabbing emails. Pick a different color or two and spice things up a bit. And how else will you make an impact if you don’t use IMPACT as your font? C’mon now!

2. Customize Your Email With Stationery

Nobody likes a white background. Add some spirals to the left of your emails. Can you say trendsetter?

3. Punctuation and the Rule of 3

When you’re writing your emails, make sure you emphasize your questions with three question marks. Feel free to add three exclamation marks if you’re really, really, really confused about something.

4. The Subject Heading Is a Must, Sometimes

Let’s be real. Once they see who the email is from, they’re going to open that bad boy right away. If you do decide to add a subject heading, though, you might as well write your entire email on there.

5. Signatures a.k.a. Your About Me Section

I know your name already. It’s the first line at the top of the email. What I really want to read in your signature line are your thoughts and interests. Give me a couple famous quotes or poems from famous authors. The longer it is, the more intelligent you appear. Don’t forget to center it.

6. Read Receipt: Need I Say More?

How else will your coworkers know that you’re a go-getter if you don’t add a read receipt to every outgoing email? Pssh, you’re not a savage.

7. Emails Travel in Pairs

Don’t worry about getting all your facts straight in your first email. There’s no time. Besides, everyone has a back-up email. This is the email you send clarifying all the errors you made in your first email. That’s why it’s a back-up!

8. The Old Multiple-Questions-In-An-Email Trick

When you receive an email filled with questions from one of your coworkers, only answer one of the questions. You’re too smart to fall for that old trick.

9. Nobody Uses Reply All

If you’re ever lucky enough to receive an email where half the company is included, only reply to the person who sent the email. You prefer to focus all of your attention on one person at a time.

10. Out-Of-Office Rep-lies

After coming back from leave, don’t even think about removing your out-of-office reply for at least a week. How else will we know to ask about your vacation if we don’t receive an auto-reply every time we send you an email?

Now that you have the basics down, you’re ready to enter the business world.

I smell a promotion in your future.

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